Statisically Speaking...

Ok, say a prayer for me please. I've just entered my first week of Statistical Analysis. I was really nervous before class, but I received my textbook in the mail and I was immediately relieved - the title was ELEMENTARY STATISTICS. Yay - we're starting out easy! With the heart of a 5th grader (it's elementary, remember?) I opened the book. Crap. I'm in trouble...

So, I get in my car (which, by the way has gas with gold flakes in it - why else would it cost so much?) and shoot on over to Wal-Mart to prepare myself for this class. Brand new notebook, dividers, pencils with BIG erasers, and my most important school supply - a Magic Eight Ball.

The first chapter is The Nature of Probability and Statistics. What's the probability that I'll squeak through this class and maintain my current 4.0 GPA? Magic Eight Ball says:












Sigh. The last chapter is about Chi-Square. What's the probability of me going to Starbucks for a Chai-T instead? Magic Eight Ball says:





Yessss... things are lookin up...

As God as my witness...

wow... today was a tough day. For those of you that know me, you know I struggle with depression. Okay, you probably do, but if you didn't know, now you do. It seems to have gotten worse in the last few years - and I don't understand that, because to me, my life is better than it was a few years ago. I've been divorced for 6 years, and the first few years after were crazy, but i was happy. Then i realized I had had to get my act together, so I settled down to the business of being a responsible adult. Yes, I've made mistakes since then, and I still make mistakes, but I'm trying...

to summarize: first three years - crazy but happy; last three years - calmer but increasingly depressed. Am I such a selfish person that being "grown up" is depressing? Am I only happy when I don't give a flip about being a responsible person? I guess if I knew the answers, I might be less depressed. who knows...

I absolutely LOVE my job - it's sad to say that it is were I'm most happy. As much as I love my job, that depresses me sometimes too. My job is great. I love what I do, and my managers respect my opinions and knowledge. Sometimes I have a bad day when I'm reminded that there are people in my office who get paid a lot more than me but do a lot less, and care even less than that. But, I keep pushing forward, hoping that some day LH's words will come true: "things happen for a reason".

Ok, so while I'm writing all this, I'm reminded that I have so much to be thankful for. Why am I such a big ole whiny baby? lol that just depresses me more. So I decided to make a list of things I'm thankful for:

1. my kids - they've got their issues too, but they are amazing people

2. my dogs - who love me no matter what

3. my friends - (see number 2)

4. my family - they love me and I love them. period.

5. my job (p.s. if you're reading this and owe a defaulted student loan, contact me - we'll work something out - it's irresponsible not to pay back the government for letting you further your education!)

6. this blog, for allowing me to vent and empty out my sometimes empty thoughts.

ok, things aren't so bad - the day is almost over and I fight to live another day. As Katie Scarlett O'Hara would say "After all, tomorrow is another day" y'all...

my gURLfriend

M, you are too funny. You make me laugh, sometime when I don't even want to. You are funny, smart, and a great friend. You're always there when I need you - and even when I don't! Thanks for the good advice, and for always lending an EAR...

U R Laughing aren't ya?

my GRRRRRLS

Rebel - what a sweetheart you are. Most of the time. You have really tried my patience this week. Why do you insist on climbing the fence when I've told you a million times NO NO NO?? Still, when you come home, you give me those sweet "I'm sorry mommy, I won't do it again (until next time)" eyes, and I melt.

My dogs, Chevy, Lacey, and Rebel (who's actually my son's dog) without a doubt are my "bestest" friends. When I'm happy, they know extra doggie treats are coming. When I'm angry, they know to steer clear of Mama until things settle down. And when things settle down, they are there - with their unconditional love. When I'm sad, they know it before anyone else does, and there is always a head in my lap, a kiss on my cheek to wipe the tears, or simply a warm puppy to cuddle with.

to my girls: thanks for those floppy, always alert, and always attentive EARs.